Growing Up

I think life is like childbirth. It's painful along the way, but then we forget and the happy memories are in the forefront of our minds. I had some tough years as a teenager, but looking back, it doesn't seem that vivid. Yesterday was tough for both my teenagers, ok, I'll go with all three.

Chelsey - Since she was about 4, she has been a 'git r done' kind of girl. When trying to tie her shoes, she wouldn't quit trying till she could do it. I love that about her. She has been really trying to make 8 feet in pole vaulting. She is soooo close. Last night when she got home from her meet, she went straight to her room. I called her down so we could talk a little. Some days I don't see her at all, just a text or two, maybe a phone call. She didn't want to come down, but I insisted so she did. The minute I mentioned track, she burst into tears. I call it the "mom effect". You know, you're fine till you see your mom, then you lose it. I encouraged her the best I could and changed the subject to other things so she could compose herself. We talked about what was going on with Whitley a little, that I got her book and what her weekend looked like. Quick story. She really wanted to go to the Easter Pageant the other night with some friends. I would have let her go, but wasn't going to let her take the car and I wasn't home at the time to help her out. Not to mention it was on Mutual night. In the end we decided for her to not go. I did let her take the car to mutual. They were just practicing volleyball and she didn't really want to go. While she was gone I had this sick feeling like maybe she went to the Easter Pageant after all. I didn't really think she would, but I didn't feel very good about it. I was trying to figure out how to check up on her without being accusing. I called a friend of mine that was at volleyball with her to see if she was there. She was. But....my friend and Chelsey had had the conversation about how she could leave anytime she wanted, but in Chelsey's words "I won't, cuz I'm good." So the thoughts were there, but she made the right choice. Scares me about the thoughts though. I'm very proud of who she is.

Whitley - Poor Whitley. Whitley is not the most organized child and not blessed with a strong sense of logic. I needed to run into town to get Chelsey's book, but I wouldn't be back in time to take her to play practice. I waited till she was sure she had a ride, then I left. She called me ten minutes before she was supposed to be there and said her ride never came and she couldn't get a hold of him. She was in tears of course. I was 45 minutes away and Glade was on his bike so I couldn't even get a hold of him. We tried a few numbers of people who might be at the practice but couldn't get a hold of anyone. As a last resort, I contacted a neighbor who I already carpool with and asked for a favor. She had her son come get Whitley and take her, but she was an hour late. THEN, to make matters worse, I guess she just recently found out that two of her friends in the play are gay. This really upset her and now she doesn't know how to handle it all. Chelsey has known for a while but didn't want to tell Whitley but decided it was time she know. She and Glade and a really good talk about it when he went to pick her up. She just has such a soft heart and does not take things lightly. I wish either one of them had told me when everything blew up (long story) with these two boys.

Nick - Poor Nick. Not poor Nick. He is back to slacking and being less than truthful about his schoolwork again. Not that he was ever doing great, but still. I went and had an impromptu visit with two of his teachers yesterday. He was sweating bullets. We have grounded and taken away everything we can think of with this kid and it just doesn't make a difference. I'm finally committed to the BIG DOG. He has one more grading period to prove himself. If he continues down this path, I will take away the only thing he has left - school! He will spend his 8th grade year at home with me doing home school. I have contemplated and researched and I always chicken out, but now I think it's just time. He can't stay in Jr. High forever, and at this rate, he will be. He was not happy to hear that ultimatum but maybe now he will put forth a little effort. Nothing else has seemed to light his fire, maybe a year at home with me will!