Saturday, July 24, 2010

Want a Ride??

I've been riding the roller coaster of myself lately. Most of it is strictly self inflicted. I have so many plans and goals and things I want to accomplish and so little energy to get it all done. My mind over matter function is seriously broken. Somehow I need to drag myself out of it and get my butt in gear. I know that so much of it stems from it being the end of summer, by end I mean my kids are almost back in school. AND that it's so far from the end of summer, I seriously can't take the heat. Then throw in the "my baby's leaving for college" factor and now you have a recipe for insanity. Yes, I feel insane right now. One minute I feel so "with it" and the next I just want to cry.

I really just want Chelsey gone already. Not in the way of "get out!", but the anticipation of it all is killing me. I'm trying to treat her like an adult, but she doesn't always want to act like one and it's hard to keep it all in balance. Lots of changing of rooms needs to happen but can't till she's moved on. I know when the time comes I will be a wreck, but waiting is making me a wreck anyway!

Running is a huge frustration for me. I ran so great in San Diego, seriously...so great. I just can't handle the heat. I have tried early morning and it's still just too hot. I have a treadmill, but I can't seem to will myself on to it. It's so easy to push the STOP button. The other night, Glade and I went for a run at 9:30 pm. It seemed like it was cool till we started running. I felt like my head was going to explode. We went 5 miles (with lots of walking breaks) and by the end, I was in tears. I might cry right now just thinking about it. Then this morning, I got up and was out by 6 am and had a fantastic run! Even had my fastest mile. I might cry just thinking about it! So goes the roller coaster of my life. Our race is in 5 weeks and I am totally excited to go do it.

Today is the 20th anniversary of mine and Glade's first date. We did it up right, too. He also informed me that this very day puts us together longer than we have been apart. He quoted the number of days, but I don't retain that sort of info. I love him dearly! The plan was to be on a cruise right now, but his Ironman is next Saturday so we couldn't work it out. It's all good!

In speaking of the Ironman, we leave Thursday with Jake and Jenny to head to Napa Valley for the race. We get to spend 5 days together as a little getaway. I'm very excited for that. My kids start school on Monday and thankfully Chelsey isn't gone yet cuz she gets to play mom while I'm gone. So many things on the horizon and yet all so far away!

1 comment:

Leslie said...

I might cry just reading all this! You're a strong, faithful woman. You'll make it through just fine.

I hate the heat too. Utah was WAY too hot. Good thing it was stormy as we drove into town today or we might have turned around and gone farther north this time. ;)